Knowing Relationship

Life Story by Daniel | Tuesday, November 27, 2007 | 1 comments »

Relationships hold a high place for most of us, especially women.

They want great relationships with clear communication, empathy, understanding, mutual trust and friendship.

But what do we get much of the time?

Relationships loaded with communication problems, irritability, conflict, misunderstandings, blame, hurt and anger!

If you have a relationship like this you know what I mean.
Stress grows and settles in your muscles and organs and you develop anxiety and depression.

Loyalty, tradition and fear of failure demand we stay.

We try again and again to fix the problems, ignore the fighting, and say the same thing for the tenth time with different words.

Do you identify with this situation?

You can stuff resentment and deny personal needs for the sake of the relationship.

But it just happen over and over again, so often that it seems like the same ‘Episode’ every week.

Walking through these relationships mine fields is hazardous to your health!

Relationship Stress, causing you to fall sick, unable to concentrate for work and even break down into depression.



What can you do?

No matter what you do, never hope that things will change for a better, cause it won't!

You have to change it yourself.

You can make a difference.

But how?

1. Get to know yourself, inside and out. Know what you want and need. Know what you like. Determine your values and priorities. Write them down. Believe in yourself and don't compromise.

2. Choose healthy relationships from the start. Don't go out looking for a red dress and settle for beige! Don't be desperate - be choosey!

3. Move slowly and develop a strong foundation. Don't get enmeshed in an
emotional relationship before you see the hazards and recognize the danger.

4. Nurture good relationships. Take the first step to schedule a get together or just chat on the phone.

5. Develop excellent communication and conflict resolution skills, and use them. This in itself can drastically change a relationship.

6. Develop assertiveness skills. Passive people ignore their needs and get walked on. Aggressive people walk on others to get what they want. Assertive people learn to get their needs met without walking on anyone.

7. Learn to really listen. Listen with body, mind and spirit.

8. Be self-aware. When a misunderstanding happens, check it out. Be sure you have all the information. Determine what part you played in the situation.

9. Develop intuition and body awareness so you can identify relationship stress in your body immediately, as it is happening. Then deal with it appropriately before it gets deadly.

10. Lose the denial. If something isn't right, deal with it. Don't play pretend and wake up too late. All relationships have misunderstandings. It's how we deal with them that counts.



If you find yourself struggling with your relationships, new or long term, don't wait!

Do what you deem is right, as Life is short.

Leave no Regrets for Future.

P.S. This post is for a friend of mine as she recently encountered some relationship problem.
Losing the sense of direction during a relationship is common for most of us.
What's important is we must make a decision on the 'direction' we want to go and find our way out, not standing in the middle of no where telling yourself 'I'm too weak to go on'.
May you find your Happiness soon my friend =)



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1 comments

  1. jiwa sifar // November 29, 2007 at 7:08 PM  

    nice...to make a relationship goes really2 well..you need a very big sacrifice..believe me..i have been thru a lot with my Love.fighting is a common thing a to be honest,after the fight the love will exponentially if we manage to discuss it heart to heart=)
    nice tips dude..
    link exchange ?
    http://blog.nawuza.org