Do you find yourself judging people when they do something you don't think are right?

When they act a way that you don't consider to be the best way to act?

When they say something you don't think should be said?

When you see someone walking down the street and they are someone you don't think you'd like to know, what's going through your mind?

Are you judging them?

Sure. We all do that to a certain extent.

Are we feeling happy when we are judging them?

We all know that it's not right to put people down, even if only it’s in our mind.
And we shouldn't be putting them up, either.

To judge means you are making someone better than you or someone worse than you are.
Either way, someone gets put up and put down.

That's not how life should be.

However, it is sometimes difficult not to judge, isn't it?

All our lives we've been taught to think, rightly or wrongly, about what someone else or ourselves are doing.
Always, it seemed, there was a winner and a loser.

But that's not the way life should be.
The fact is you never come out ahead when you put someone down.

‘But it's a habit, what can I do?’



Imagine the scenario where everyone is judging you.
Imagine everyone around you walking with his or her nose in the air.
(Nose in the air, the look of feeling proud)

How would you feel?

Or, someone is in front and admires you so much that he/her just wish he/her were exactly like you.

What would you think of the person after seeing the face full of envy?

Everyone around you hates you.
All their faces show nothing but hatred.

How would you feel?

Do think about it whenever you are about to judge someone, think about everyone in the whole world knew what you are thinking.

Would you think twice before judging someone?

Why not realises what you are doing ahead of time and stop it?

Give that other person a chance.
You just might make some great new friends that way, and wouldn't that be terrific?

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You might not know it, but often people believe in keeping their grief hidden inside.
But the fact is it’s impossible.

What ever you feel inside, will eventually come out.
Come out through frustration, resentment or even anger.

Never try hiding your negative feelings, cause you know you can’t.

When you know your relative has cancer, what’s the first thing that comes to your mind?
‘Is he going to die?’
‘He must be suffering.’
‘His family must be going through a lot of pain and expenses.’

What ever your mind comes out, it’s not good isn’t it?

Do you know we are actually showing these thoughts through our physiology and facial expression?
Unable to keep eye contact, feeling tense, shivering, facial expression of sadness or remorse are all typical thoughts that our body is reflecting.



Is this good or bad?

Imagine, if you’re the patient or family, how would you feel when you see someone behaving like that when you inform them about it?

Do you feel better?
Or
More pain adding on to your current one?
More negative thoughts coming out of your mind?

Isn’t your purpose of visit supposed to comfort the patient and family? Or provide additional support?

There’s just too much bad experience for us to stop behaving like that.
Memories of our loved ones or friend who’ve lost the battle to illness are causing these negative thoughts.

What about those people without such experience? Why are they behaving in such way too?

It’s because there are too many horror stories going around us from those people who went through it.
It’s because of these stories that people are behaving in such way.



Don’t share horror stories.
Don’t share horror experiences.

Stop people, who take prides in sharing such stories, stop them politely.
Change the subject of conversation, or share something good about your experience.
(Even if you have to dig hard to search for it)

People who are used in talking about things that’s bad might not realize it; they are actually causing pain to the others.
Let them understand ‘Isn’t it good to hear good things rather than bad’.

If you keep looking at only the bad things happening to the person, whenever you see that person you just can’t keep a bland face.
You can’t just keep a cheerful face and pretend that things are normal isn’t it?

That’s what happen to a lot of people, their reaction simply display on their faces even if they’re trying hard not to.
This will cause hope to dwindle from the patient, little or more.

Experience the goodness of sharing your love, not grief.
Change your thoughts, stop yourself from feeling the bad =)

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